Saturday, November 30, 2019

The Reality Of "Getting Big"

People who are obsessed with bodybuilding may be the most insecure people of all. All over YouTube, Instagram, and other social media we have people who pretend to be "natural" boasting advice, supplements, and so on to young men. Young men turn to these drug addicted fitness models in hopes of learning how to "get big." People obsess over bodybuilding and make it a lifestyle in priority. Why do people do it? For confidence, mostly. Fake naturals paint incredibly unrealistic views for naturals when it comes to fitness, as they promise you can build a body like themselves naturally which complete bull. 

 You will be surprised how many bodybuilders judge their self worth on how big they are. It's ridiculous. If you ever seen how people on the bodybuilding forums talk, you will see how insecure they are. When I head to my college gym. I see the largest dudes (a couple of them are definitely on roids), eyeing up everybody, trying to make sure they are bigger than anyone else.  The most muscled dudes are always looking around, trying to see if they're the biggest in the room. They also expect themselves to be chick magnets because they're buff, but it does not work like that. 

I never really did bodybuilding, but I did sports in high school and got into strength training, and I built a large amount of muscle since I kept it up with resistance training, because it is truly great, it has many benefits. I got substantially bigger, and yes, it's great, but you don't need to obsess fitness 24/7 to get a good physique. 

There is a difference between bodybuilding and working out for health reasons. At this point I just workout to get stronger and stay fit. Trying to reach my "natty potential" would not be very impressive, when naturals will never look like the crazy juiced up fitness models. People are ridiculous in the gym. They realize they cannot get big naturally so they get fat in order to "look bigger." And then others takes steroids to look bigger. Why? If you are not getting paid to be an athlete, model, Olympia contender, or whatever and you take steroids, you have some serious bigorexia. 

I am not saying you stop lifting weights. I love lifting weight. there is a difference between the guy who is in there 6 days a week doing curls, lateral raises, 10 different chest exercise "to hit every angle of the chest" and exercises that are almost completely useless like leg extensions and the guy who is in there 3-4 days a week who focuses on getting a good workout and leaving.

I'm in the gym 3 days a week, I do strength training 3 days a week, and I do sprinting 3 days a week. I workout 6 days a week, but my goal is to stay strong and stay fast. Muscle is a byproduct. I also run an incredibly minimalist routine, and I still get compliments on my physique. Why? Because I focus on getting stronger on the right exercises. Dumbbell Overhead Presses, Weighted Chin-Ups, and so on. I love fitness, but I hate bodybuilding AKA working out purely to get as big as possible and engaging in a shit ton of isolation exercises (used to workout like a bodybuilder when I was a teen, trust me it won't give you results if you spend hours doing curls and lateral raises.)

So why do men do this? Why do men go to the gym for hours a week, trying to chase a perfect body? Why do they force eat food to get bigger? Why do they spend a ton of money on useless supplements? Why?

It's probably a couple reasons. The most common two are for sure, confidence and attracting women. How do I know this? Look at the bodybuilding forum. People on there judge their self worth purely on how many woman they can sleep with and how big they can get, seriously.

If I tell a bodybuilder that they are doing it for confidence or women, they will tell me no, "I am doing it for myself." What does that even mean? If you are doing it for yourself, you would not worry about how big the long head of your triceps. No one cares except for yourself, getting bigger triceps won't make you magically a better person, a more confident person, or even necessarily a stronger person. That's the whole point of the vlog, getting big won't help you. If you were doing it for yourself, you would workout hard at the gym but wouldn't obsess over your physique and tracking how many calories you are eating a day. 

Like I said, there is 3 types of people at the gym. The guy who doesn't know what he's doing and goes from machine to machine, barely pushing himself, doing 10 sets of curls, 10 sets of lateral raises, and moves on and achieves no results in strength or physical development. The second guy is a guy who is in there and works out hard, focuses on getting stronger, pushes himself on the right exercises, and outside the gym he eats well, but doesn't obsess over dieting (this is who you should strive to be. I see plenty of dudes who have great physiques doing this and they don't engage in obsessive bodybuilding). The third guy is the pure bodybuilder. He is in there usually a minimum of 5 days a week, he tracks his calories, he does 20 different chest exercises on chest day, and he makes his physique his mission. That's not a bad thing, but it's better off if you have a real mission in life, and you use fitness as hobby, not a mission or obsession. 

So back to my point, essentially guys whose goal is to get as big as possible do it to either attract women or gain confidence. I will explain why both of these results will not be achieved by "getting big."

 Like I said, a lot of muscled dudes are the most insecure. There was this one incident on Instagram where a model photoshopped his arms to look bigger on his profile. Later, his girlfriend posted a pic with him in it, and we could clearly see his arms are way smaller than on his profile, so that's how the internet knew his profile had photoshopped pictures of his arms. But if you look at the pic of him with his girlfriend, he already had a great physique. Why would he photoshop his arms? Insecurity.

Muscles can make you confident for sure, but you should not obsess over them like a bodybuilder, which is why I advocate you to be the second guy on the list of three types of people at the gym I provided. And again, getting big will not make a beast. What does build confidence? Knowing how to fight. I don't care if a bodybuilder weighs 200lbs, a 160lb MMA fighter can have that bodybuilder in a BJJ submission in a couple seconds. Muscles will not help you fight, but strength training can which is why I aid for men to go to the gym to get a good workout that is good for them physically and mentally, not trying focus on getting their pecs as big as possible.

Secondly, getting big will not attract women either. Like I said, there is a difference between having a nice, fit physique and looking like a bodybuilder who is trying to get as big as possible. Most women do not care for big muscles, they care for you to have a nice body but not as big as most bodybuilders want to be, or anywhere near as much.

For example, look at this site.
Sports bodies ranked by women. You know who got first? Soccer players. Most soccer players hardly lift weights. Also their bodies are built for endurance, not strength. Seriously, soccer players are pretty much twigs according to bodybuilders. Yet, they have the most attractive body according to women. Why? Because they're very fit. Not muscular. 

Also, bodies are a low priority for women for dating, I hate to break it to you. The order of importance for woman when it comes to physical attributes would go in this order.

Number one, your face. If you got an ugly face, you're kinda fucked when it comes to women. If you got a pretty boy face or you are handsome, and you aren't obese or anorexic, congrats you don't need to even hit the gym and you can get with most women.

Number two, your height. My friend is 5'3. He is a man. He has tried many, many times to get with women. He has an average face. He works out. He is socially very skilled and is friends with many people. But every women has rejected him. Height will literally fuck you when it comes to dating if you are a man. 

Number three, your body composition. This is the least important by far. I will argue that it will only affect your dating life if you are either fat or a incredibly skinny. 

The thing is, gay men love muscular dudes. Not sure why, but that's how it is. So if you are a gay dude, go ahead and become a beefcake. It will help you attract men. But if you're straight like me, as long as you are in good shape, you're dating life won't improve by becoming as big as possible. Woman care for face and height the most. Unfortunately, these two things are mostly genetic.

So that's the reality of getting as big as possible. I advocate for everyone to do strength training, I don't advocate for bodybuilding. To sum up this blog, I have a little quote from fight club for you.

" felt sorry for guys who packed into gyms, trying to look like how Calvin Klein or Tommy Hilfiger said they should." 

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